I am such a sucker. I really am. I'd fall for anything. I'm gullible, and stupid, and crazy, and a sucker.
Hung out with Mr. Stonecold last night. Five hours of amazing later, we finally talked. (Yes, I know the talking should have come first, I told you I was a sucker).
We talked about his ex-girlfriend. Did I mention she's married? Did I mention she was married while they were dating? Did I mention she kept feeding him the "I'm getting ready to tell him I want a divorce" line the whole time? Did I mention she's 22 and he's 35? (EWWWW) He loves her. He probably always will. He was honest about that.
We talked about us. We talked about the fact that we're back into the beneficial relationship again. We talked about how his actions over the past three weeks have appeared decidedly deceptive. We talked about how his astrologically sign and her astrologically sign will never match, but ours match great. (He's a Cancer, I'm a Pisces, she's an Aries).
Then we talked about hope. He said he had made the decision to cut her out. He came to realization that she needs to stay with her husband and that he is not going to be the one she chooses. He came to the realization that although he loves her, and always will, they can never be together. I asked how he could give up hope that they would ever be together.
I was talking about him and her, but I was really referring to my feelings towards him. I don't know if he got that. He is a man after all.
His response was that hope was necessary, but now his hope was no longer that they would get together, but that he would overcome his fear in looking for a real relationship. He looked me straight in the eyes and said you can't ever give up hope, especially if it is someone you really want. But then he said he doesn't hope for her anymore because its just not going to happen.
Shit. Now what? I'm such a sucker. I'm an idiot. I'll fall for anything. I know he's playing me. I see him playing me. I have played the same fricken games. I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that he does not, and will not, have feelings for me. But now I have hope. Damn it.
11 comments:
I just found out some awful shit about the guy I'm hung up on....but, yet here I am...wanting so damn bad to see him. Why are we such suckers? I don't know, but I do know that you need to pass me an oar, cuase we are soooo rowing in the same boat!!!!
I'd pass you an oar, but I'm more concerned about the fact that we're sinking!!!
I'm sorry about the breaking news on your guy. It sucks. Let me know what happens!!!
Any more room in that boat? I've got one who keeps me hanging on and he's either not that into me or he's scared to death of me emotionally.
There's always room in the boat. Don't know where we're going. Don't know if we're ever gonna get there. Don't know if the boat will make it. But there's always room for one more!
When did life get so complicated???
oh, yes....now I remember...when we let men in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sbs you SOOOOO have to fill me in! Sounds like an ass, not that it makes anything easier.
I will....but not here....what's your email?
I'm assuming that your IM name is bslawg....
That's where I sent the story
:)
the email i sent came back
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